Saturday, November 19, 2011

The least ballin' whips on which to get a DUI.

If you drive drunk, you are dumb and selfish. That said, we may as well go ahead and acknowledge that some circumstances in which one could find one's self with a DUI are more humiliating, and less ballin', than others.

20. Bumper car.
19. Bicycle.
18. Push mower.
17. Recumbent bicycle.
16. Sled.
15. Covered mess wagon at a Civil War re-enactment.
14. Four-wheel dolly.
13. Covered mess wagon at a Gulf War re-enactment.
12. While doing a "walk the dog" yo-yo trick (could also be sort of ballin' though).
11. Two-wheel dolly.
10. Rolling executive office chair.
9. Retractable dome of sporting arena.
8. Bicycle mounted to a stationary bicycle trainer.
7. Bubble mower.
6. Roller skate. Singular.
5. Bubble mower that doesn't light up or make any sounds.
4. Rolling suitcase.
3. Unicorn-themed carnival ride that a carnival hand operates and rides by himself at four in the morning.
2. Rolling suitcase that still has a "Tulsa -> Indianapolis" airport tag tied to it from 2008.
1. Trundle wheel.

3 comments:

  1. Wonderful. To add:

    The mechanical rides that cost a quarter per use in front of the supermarket

    Hamster wheel

    Houston Intercontinental mini-monorail car

    ReplyDelete
  2. I have to agree those are really funny, thank you very much for sharing.
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    ReplyDelete
  3. I agree with you that if you drive drunk, you are dumb and selfish. Drunk driving is a very serious matter. It can injure or worst kill people.

    ny rehab center

    ReplyDelete